This year I am really trying to go Green! I’ve never really thought about my wastefulness having such an impact on the planet. (Uh, yeah, I don’t know where I have been either!) Since I work out 5 mornings a week, my car started to become a water bottle wasteland. That’s about 260 water bottles per year. Not good. Since the new year, I bought myself a Rubbermaid water bottle and have reused it about 30 times. That’s 2 cases of water bottles not bought – used – or thrown away. Yay me! I encourage you to join me in buying a reusable water bottle!

I have also stopped using grocery bags. I bought 3 reusable grocery bags at Ralphs and use them at Ralphs, Trader Joes, or wherever I shop. They were a buck fifty each. Every time I bring them back to Ralphs, I get a five-cent credit for each bag. According to my calculations, I’ll get 15 bucks in free groceries this year and help the environment, and not use over 150 plastic bags(that’s not counting double bagging heavy stuff)! My three grocery bags are enough to shop for a family of five. They are bigger and stronger than paper or plastic. I’ve only forgotten them at home once. After I unload my bags, I put them right back into my car.

I picked up a copy of the green book, the EVERYDAY GUIDE to SAVING the PLANET ONE SIMPLE STEP at a TIME by Elizabeth Rogers and Thomas M. Kostigen. Which by the way was, was printed on 100% recycled paper.

These are just baby steps, but I have to start somewhere. (:

Remember Woodsy Owl’s motto “Give a hoot, don’t pollute!” Well, I do and the issue of littering has been on my mind for quite some time now. I am sure that I have mentioned that I am a total square as well as a rule follower. I do not litter. Ever. I really thought that by 2007 littering would be a non-issue. Not the case. When was the last time you saw some person, feeling anonymous, throw nasty trash out of a car window, or a kid drop something on the ground, or worse yet, an adult litter in plain view? I am sure that if you were paying attention, you’d realize that it happens way more than you think.

A couple of months ago I was walking my seven-year-old home from school when he noticed some trash on the ground and decided to pick it up. Well, of course he handed it to me to put into my Coach messenger bag, (yucky). Yet, how could I say no when he was just trying to “Clean up the Earth?” as he put it. While we were walking, he spotted several pieces of litter along the way. My poor bag was brimming with the filthy trash left by some lazy and inconsiderate people, all-the-while defacing my adorable bag.

I remember when being called a litterbug in the schoolyard was a terrible insult. I don’t think it is anymore. Would you believe that while my son and I were cleaning up after litterbugs, we saw a middle school-aged kid actually throw his water bottle on to the street? He didn’t care who saw him do it either. Hmmm, remember that saying that it takes a village to raise a child? I am a firm believer in that. I had no problem telling that kid in my best teacher’s voice to pick up his trash NOW and I may have mentioned something about having no respect and how his mother would be ashamed of him. He bent over, picked it up, mumbled something under his breath, and walked away. There I was with my little do-gooder son, cleaning up other people’s garbage. He just stared at them with his giant blue eyes and mouth hanging wide open, confused and visibly traumatized. All right, so I am exaggerating slightly. Here, I was actually trying to teach my child something good and he gets to watch these little turds do just the opposite. So frustrating. Dumb dummies!!!!

“Mom, why do people litter?” he asked. “Well, I guess it’s because they don’t care about the Earth, they are lazy, have no respect, and weren’t taught by their parents?” I really thought that kids were the main culprits in this department until I really started paying attention.

Caution: The following content may cause emotional distress for Earth Lovers.

My informal study shocked and disgusted me and you will not believe what I saw.
First, I saw a car full of ADULTS dumping fast food trash on the ground in a parking lot. Oh my stars!!! Do adults really litter? Gross. Then, I was at the park with my boot camp group and there was a dirty diaper left of the sidewalk. Do you think the baby left it there? By the way, nothing motivates you to do your push-ups like smelly diapers. Later, while running along a beach trail in San Clemente, I had to hold my breath to minimize the stench. Try running while holding your breath! I have never, EVER seen so much trash on the beach in my life! Over the distance of two and a half miles there was enough trash to fill probably three dumpsters. And yet, there are trashcans every hundred feet or so and no one could make it ALL the way over to fill them.

Now, on to Doheny Beach. It gets so crowded in the summer that it actually reeks of garbage and leftover food. Litter in the parking lot, litter in the grass, and litter in the sand. Argh! I felt just like the commercial with the Native American looking over the litter-covered land while a teardrop slowly runs down his face. Oh the humanity! Finally, I was looking out the window of my studio and saw some delinquent kids on the third floor throwing trash down to the fountain on the first floor. Once again, adults were involved as the “parents” of these kids, but said nothing. It’s just so wrong on so many levels.

AHHHHHHHHH!!! Who are these terrible litterbugs?? Where did they come from? Have they no pride? I think not. If you are a litterbug and you are reading this … think again my friend. You are just making yourself look like a slovenly, ignorant jerk. Of course, MY readers are of the highest quality, intellect, and social awareness so I really doubt I am speaking to any of you. So just do your part and let’s keep this place clean! Mother Earth thanks you.

So you have heard the saying green is the new black, or forty is the new thirty, right? Well, I am declaring that nice is the new mean. Being nice to others is easy, fast, and best of all it’s free. It also lowers your stress level and it’s the right thing to do. Being nice is one of the very first things that we were taught as toddlers. “Be nice” goes on like a broken record at preschool. Maybe showing our children how to be nice would have more impact on them than just telling them to be nice. Hey, I might be on to something here.

Have you ever noticed how much energy it takes to be mean to someone? Did you notice how mean perfect strangers are to one another? I have. I’ve seen it while shopping, while eating, and most of all while driving! By the way who declared that it is (use air quotes here to get the full effect) “YOUR” lane anyway? Is it really going to ruin your day to let that poor soul who’s had the blinker on for five minutes get over? Are those two seconds really going to make a difference in your life? No, they are absolutely not. Just because someone changes lanes doesn’t mean they think that their car goes faster than yours. And no, they are not out to get you. Well, probably not. Ha.

I have a habit of being very aware of the people around me. I like to be randomly nice and I really love to make someone’s day by being kind, helpful, or just by saying something nice. It’s my nature. (Don’t worry – I have plenty of flaws – this just happens not to be one of them.) I like the way it feels to be nice to people. It makes me happy. I’ve always been somewhat of a square, so I like to follow the rules and do the right thing. I’ve always wondered why some people go out of their way to be mean. What’s the point of that?

Well, let’s not dwell on the negative. Let’s figure out ways to be nice to others. I think that our overall quality of life would greatly improve if we all took a little time to be nice. What fun is it to be around a bunch of frowny-faced grouchy people? No fun. No fun at all. Who can resist a great big smile and a warm “Good Morning!” to start the day? I think you would be surprised by how many folks stop for coffee on the way to work just to be greeted by a warm welcome and a smiling face. I don’t think it’s the five dollar cup of coffee that’s luring them back. It’s the nice feeling that is associated with the coffee that brings us back. How can we replicate that feeling in other aspects of our life?

We can start by being friendly to our fellow man and woman, and of course the children. How about waving to your neighbor on the way to work? Hold the door for someone and tell him or her to have a good day. Let someone have that great parking spot! Help that lady carry her groceries. Give out some compliments. Go ahead, you can do it! Make someone feel good. Your kindness can greatly affect someone. We just never know the impact that we can have on a perfect stranger. You have the power to warm up someone’s heart by acknowledging his or her existence. I am willing to bet that if you are kind to someone then they will be kind to someone else. Now go out there and by nice! Let me know how it goes for you. Thank you for reading and have a great week!

I don’t know about you, but when I have to do any public speaking I freak. I mean FREAK!! I lose sleep; have nightmares, and totally spaz out! Public speaking is a part of life and definitely a part of weddings. If you are lucky enough to be chosen as a maid of honor a speech is par for the course. Remember this is your sister or very best friend asking you to stand up and speak to friends and family. This is a tall order. You must display poise, etiquette, and most importantly personality. You can do it! After all, this is your best friend and you know every thing about her. Uh, yeah … every embarrassing fact, bad habits, drunken college stories, need I go on? Ok, that sort of speech might get a giggle, but most likely an uncomfortable courtesy laugh. Come on, this isn’t just the girlfriends … we are talking parents, grandparents, and future in-laws! Let’s make a good impression. You’ve got to keep it together! You can do it and I can help!

I have heard more speeches that I care to remember, and a handful that I will never forget. Speeches that moved me to tears and speeches that just plain cracked me up. The longest speech on record was 17 minutes (I’m not kidding). The shortest was about 30 seconds. I must say I prefer the latter, but a 1-2 minute well planned speech is ideal. You might be shocked to see what 2 minutes look like on paper!

When planning your speech, it’s a good idea to hit on four points.
One: a quick story of your friendship, humorous or heartfelt
Two: give some love to the groom, keep it simple and be nice
Three: give a bit of inspiration or advice to the couple - quotes can be a big hit
Four: wrap it up with a toast to their bright and happy future together

I consulted one of Orange County’s premiere wedding coordinators, Jennifer Scheumann of It’s Your Day! Weddings by Jennifer, to get some tips about great speech giving. Jennifer had some clever advice to help prepare for the big event.

Since public speaking is the number one fear, this can cause a lot of anxiety for some. There are a few ways to ease the butterflies… PRACTICE, PRACTICE, and PRACTICE! The more you practice, the more comfortable you will feel. Practice it in the car, when you are getting ready, doing laundry, making dinner, you get the idea! Remember that it’s perfectly acceptable to use your notes if you need them. You will most likely have memorized your speech from all of your diligent practicing, but it might make you feel better knowing you can refer to them if you do get stuck. If you get nervous, just look at the bride and groom, and speak directly to them. It doesn’t really matter exactly what you say, but rather the way you say it and the emotion behind the toast. Just remember to keep it short and sweet, speak from the heart and you can’t go wrong!
Thanks for your suggestions Jennifer! Remember that you want the audience to laugh or cry. If you evoke any emotion in them you will be wildly successful! So prepare yourself! As always, these are just my opinions (my college professor might disagree – but he hasn’t been to hundreds of weddings!), but hopefully you will be a little more confident in writing and delivering your speech!

So what’s it going to be? Filet, prime rib, fish, maybe chicken? A summer salad, a seafood salad, or perhaps a lobster bisque? Cake, crème puffs, cup cakes, or a gourmet dessert sampler? Are you hungry yet? The meal you choose for your wedding may require more effort than you thought! Couples today are more concerned about the quality of the food served at their weddings than ever. More and more venues are chosen with the food factor in mind. Gone are the days of boring wedding chicken! Yay! Here are the days of delicious food with beautiful presentation – and rightly so! Who would want to throw a fabulous party with mediocre food? Certainly not the Orange County bride! Let’s not leave out the groom – this is one wedding aspect that he will readily and happily attend and participate.

One wedding that’s coming up will be serving gourmet burgers! Does that sound like the most fun ever?? Gourmet burgers with all kinds of fun toppings!! How would you take your gourmet burger? Gorgonzola cheese, roma tomatoes, crispy onions, sautéed mushrooms, Bermuda onions, crumbled blue cheese, sun dried tomatoes, guacamole, or how about a spicy jalapeno spread? This is super unique and something that I think that all of the guests will really appreciate and enjoy!

Iva Lee’s catered one of my all time favorite meals served at a wedding. Iva Lee’s is a fabulous restaurant in San Clemente that also caters weddings and events. The meal started with an heirloom tomato stack with burrata cheese, micro basil with balsamic drizzle, followed by wild mushroom soup with cappuccino froth, next was the prime filet mignon with a demi-glace and a butter poached lobster tail with chive mashed potatoes and grilled asparagus. Need I say more? Oh, I didn’t mention dessert! This mouthwatering menu was completed with individual mini wedding cakes with chocolate cake and chocolate mousse filling, white butter cream frosting decorated with Johnny Jump-Ups (edible flowers) with a raspberry coulis. Ok, who is hungry now?

Another meal that stands out was served at Arroyo Trabuco Golf Club. Arroyo Trabuco is unlike any other golf club. They actually have a wedding garden that is nowhere near the putting green! The club was designed with weddings in mind. Beyond being one of my favorite wedding locations, the food is divine! The meal choices are endless, but here’s one of my favorites! We started out with a wonderful medley of California petite greens with pecan crusted medallions of goat cheese, grape tomatoes, and raspberry vinaigrette. For the main course it was a broiled filet of beef with a Cabernet Sauvignon on a bed of grilled polenta served with white & green asparagus with baby carrots and scalloped potatoes with fontina and artichokes. To finish this amazing meal … chocolate tuxedo-dipped strawberries! If this sounds pleasing to the palette, then be sure to check out the scenery!

Whatever your taste, you are bound to find the perfect meal for your big day! Happy food tasting!

Now more than ever, finding the prefect ring that fits personal style and taste is possible. This is probably the most important and meaningful gift a lucky gal could receive. This isn’t just any ring, we are taking about a piece of jewelry that will be worn till death … or at least until upgrade! This ring should match who she is, her personality and lifestyle. Is she a classic beauty, active and athletic, a traditional girl, or does she have a vintage style? Maybe she is simply a princess. Well, whatever her style there is a ring just waiting to be placed on her finger!

Today’s groom takes ring selection to heart and ring choosing is a very prideful event. I can’t say that I disagree with you fellas, to see the look in your girl’s eyes when you propose and present the rock! Priceless. This moment only happens once, and you want to sweep her off of her feet! If you are like most grooms-to-be you have done your homework; dropping hints about shapes and styles that she likes … maybe “borrowing” one of her other rings to get an accurate size. I am sure that she didn’t suspect a thing! Yeah right! Just kidding guys, she had no idea. Wink wink. In the end, all of the ohh-ing and ahh-ing will ultimately be credited to you and your stellar ring selection. It’s the effort in this huge feat that actually deserves the credit, not necessarily your three months salary.
I find that only a handful of men actually let the bride-to-be participate in the choosing of her ring. There are many good reasons for this. This could be a girl that doesn’t ever wear jewelry and you want her to pick something that she is sure to be comfortable wearing. Perhaps she is the most discerning bride with a particular taste with no room for guesswork. It could be that that you are dealing with an heirloom and need to have something custom designed. Most of these proposals are done after the groom-to-be has had the ring for a while and will spring it on her when she least expects it. This ensures an element of romance and surprise. No matter which route you decide to take, she’ll love you and her ring forever! After all, this is the symbol that will be worn for years to come and remind you of your love every time you look at it.

For your classic beauty, you might want to consider this cushion cut surrounded with more diamonds.

The active girl might really enjoy the eternity band. Great for someone who isn’t comfortable with a higher set solitaire and perhaps doesn’t wear much jewelry.

For your traditional girl, you might want to consider a single round solitaire.

Your vintage girl might be interested in an antique ring that perhaps is an heirloom.

Of course, the princess cut is perfect for your princess!

As always, these are only my opinions and ideas expressed based on my beautiful brides of the past to help evoke a little extra thought before the ring selection begins! Don’t worry guys she’ll help you in picking out the wedding band!

Whether you choose a wedding location across the street, across town, or across the country there is sure to be a perfect wedding venue for you!  Location! Location! Location! I know you’ve heard it all before, but location is key to the beauty, look and feel of your wedding and photos. Did I mention you location is important? This is a hot topic for me because I just returned from a beautiful and tropical destination wedding in Maui! Do I have the best job or what? To get whisked away to beautiful places and to be with people on their happiest day! I am so lucky and trust me I am grateful for it!

This particular couple, Dana and Ken, wanted a simple and intimate wedding from the start. No fuss, not too many guests. I knew that I wanted to be a part of their day as soon as I met Dana, so soft-spoken and sweet. She even referred to my photos as “pieces” she would say “I really like this piece,” as if it were a piece of art. I love that! The bride had a venue set here in So Cal, but decided later that wasn’t the feel she wanted for her wedding. The wedding was originally scheduled to be in September, but was moved to March on a whim! I think that they made an outstanding decision and I was so pleased they wanted us to come along.

You have never seen a more calm and collected bride. Dana found a wedding coordinator from White Orchid Weddings, based in Maui. They did everything! I mean everything, Dana and Ken and the six, yes six, guests just had to show up! Dana and Ken stayed at the beautiful Fairmont Kea Lani Resort. White Orchid Weddings took care of hair and make up using their preferred vendors. Bernadette Freitas, the coordinator, arranged a beachfront ceremony equipped with a local officiate, and a Hawaiian guitarist, and traditional leis. She also helped them get the marriage license and much more!

The ceremony backdrop was a breathtaking ocean view and there were no bad angles. Everywhere we went, we had amazing backgrounds and we couldn’t get a bad shot! This is such a nice perk for photographers. Having a beautiful setting makes all the difference in the world in your photos!

If you are interested in a low stress, easy going not-to-mention beautiful wedding that will be more like a vacation for you, you guests, and heck … even your photographer… you might want to consider a destination wedding! If you are considering Maui, then be sure to give White Orchid Weddings a call. As always, these are only my opinions and ideas given to stir up ideas to have the prefect wedding no matter what your destination or location!

Balancing life as a mother has proven to be one of the most difficult parts of life for many women. There are several views about this subject and they seem to change depending on whom you are asking. Not terribly long ago I was getting my hair done sitting next to a nice lady who was talking about being a stay-at-home mom. She was very proud to be able to stay home with her children, but made a few negative comments about working moms. Now, I know that she did not mean to offend anyone. In fact, I am sure that she didn’t even think I was a mom because I just look so darn young … ok, I am back from my fantasy… sometimes we make generalizations without thinking about who is listening.

I have always been a working mom. I was able to stay home with my oldest child for one year, and I was only able to stay home with my youngest for 5 months. Guess what? If I didn’t HAVE to work when they were babies I wouldn’t have. It’s that simple. It wasn’t a choice it was a necessity. I do not apologize for having to work, nor will I be made to feel guilty for having to do so. It’s just life and every situation is different, not better or worse, just different.

This has always been a big issue in my circle of friends and we often chat about it. One of my best friends has been home for three years and loves being with her children and having the freedom and flexibility, but she feels like she’s losing her identity. When you are ‘Mommy’ all day sometimes you forget your grown up self. Like when you are having coffee with the girls and announce that you have to go ‘potty’. Oh geez, I mean really! It’s that social and family balance that some stay-at-home moms desperately try to find. You certainly always want to be there when your kids need you but on the flip side you don’t want to walk around with Cheerios stuck in your hair all day. It’s the social element that keeps us sane! We all need to dress a little sassy and have a little adult conversation with the girlfriends!

My situation is pretty fabulous because I get to be a working mom who also gets to be at home. It took a long time to get here, but I am so grateful that I can have a career with the flexibility to help out at school and be home after school. It’s still tough to balance everything just because it’s life and unexpected stuff happens everyday. It takes a pretty talented mom who can juggle family, career, and social life! My hat goes off to any mom who can balance all three!

I don’t know why I let the lady at the hair salon get to me. I guess it just reminds me that we can’t put people down because we just don’t know the circumstances of their lives. If you are happy and feel fulfilled in the important aspects of your life, well then I think you are doing it right! My personal goal as a mother is to help shape my kids into well-rounded, kind, contributing members of society. I also want to help create positive and lasting memories of their childhood. I can’t imagine that any mom – working or not – would disagree with that.

This One is for the Moms Who …

I didn’t grow up with a mom. She left the family when I was just three years old. I don’t know why she left and I guess I never will. I stayed with her a little bit at the ages of three, five, and nine. I vaguely remember those times and most of my memories are the ones that I made up when looking at photos. When you are a kid who’s abandoned by your parent, for some reason you glorify them and their memory. I thought she was the greatest, most beautiful mom in the whole world. I dreamed of being with her, only to be hit with the disappointing reality that she was not coming back for me. Ever. It could be as long as a year between phone calls and once she sent me a Christmas card for Easter. Depressing. Confusing. I just didn’t understand.

My dad did the best that he could. He was just twenty-six trying to raise two little girls. Thankfully, his parents were there to help. They were wonderful grandparents, but they were just that. Grandparents. Weekends and summers – no matter how fun – would never fill the void of being motherless. Motherless, that is a harsh word. After all, she was still alive; she just didn’t want us. How does a dad explain to his babies that mommy is never coming back. Why did he have to explain it anyway? Why did he get all the blame when he’s the one who stayed? I have to say that I blamed him and thought that he was trying to keep us away from her. It was a hell of a lot easier than believing that your own mother could leave you behind like you were nothing. I am sorry Dad. It wasn’t until much later in life that I realized that you were trying to protect us by never badmouthing her.

I wanted a mom to hold me tight and sing to me when I was a little girl. I wanted a mom who cheered me on. I wanted a mom who helped me get ready for prom. I wanted a mom to give me good advice. I wanted a mom who cried the first time she held my babies. I wanted a mom who knew me better than I know myself. I wanted a mom who could teach me how to be a mom. I wanted a mom to be proud of me. Just a mom, I wanted a mom. I am now thirty-three and I’d be lying if I didn’t say I still want a mom.

This Mother’s Day I honor moms. I honor the moms who understand that they are the world and more to their children. This one is for the moms who love unconditionally, constantly, and sincerely. This one is for the moms who know the incredible impact that they have on their children. So, I take the liberty of telling you that you are the sparkle in his eye, you are her confidant, and you are the one who holds his fragile trust in your hands. You, YOU are absolutely and utterly irreplaceable. You are a mom and this one is for you. Happy Mother’s Day.